oneof.us

When a recent movie’s opening scene has a gopher in it, and the movie’s title is not “Caddy Shack 6: Return from the Fringe”, you *know* that it’s only going to get worse from there on out… And it did!  “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull” is what you get when you let three, on-the-verge-of-senile Hollywood types write, direct, produce and star in a major motion picture. BARF!

When I first viewed a trailer for the movie a year or so ago, I had hope and I was excited. A few months ago I read, on a Burger King cup, I believe, that one of the characters (Indy’s sidekick) was named “Mutt”.  “Are you kidding me?!” was a popular phrase of mine at the time.  Mutt, why is he called Mutt? Maybe because he’s got a sordid past? Lame!  It’s as childish and obvious as those Mr. Men cartoons of the 70’s.  If his name is Mr. Forgetful, I wonder what his character traits are? GROAN!

On to special effects.  They seemed to be added with the mindset that “I own ILM, might as well throw as much CG in this movie as possible. People love CG, right?” POPPYCOCK!

You would think that lame one-liners, obvious plot twists, pointless side-characters, and an over-use of the exclamation “Jooooooooooooooooooones!” would prove that these former behemoths have just lost touch with their audience, but, you’d be wrong. I would say that 80 to 90% of the audience loved the movie, and laughed at all the slapstick comedy and punchy-dialog. To that, I once again yell, “Are you kidding me?!” UGH!

I had a great deal more fun and enjoyment ranting against the movie in the theater parking lot, than I did sitting through the entire spectacle… So, the point I’m trying to make is, THIS MOVIE IS TERRIBLE!  I know this rant won’t change your mind; good for you for not being a sheep, but, I really hope you don’t enjoy it. If you do see it, and you think it’s a great movie, don’t tell me, because I’ll think so much less of you as a person :p

Oh, and guess what, THERE ARE ALIENS IN AN INDIANA JONES MOVIE! I’m not even lying… Aliens…

(Thanks for the pic idea Emily!)

I had the chance to catch Ocean’s Thirteen this weekend, and I really liked it.  It was smart, funny, and kept my interest throughout. I can’t quite compare it to the second one, because I honestly can’t remember what that one was all about, but as far as comparing it to the first, I would say, at first glance, that it was at least as good as Ocean’s Eleven.

Definitely a recommended flick.

So I’d never watched an episode of HBO’s “The Sopranos” while it was on the air, but now that it’s done and over, I can’t get enough of it. I love being able to watch a show without having to wait until the following week to see what happens next. I watch it at my own pace, and watch as many episodes in a row as I want to–very convenient.

This show is as good as everyone claimed it to be, but I’m a little worried about what everyone has said about the final season(s). I hear that it just gets worse and there are a lot of “do-nothing”/filler episodes (such as “Lost” was for a while).

Anyway, I mainly wanted to say that it’s a good show that’s worth the watch if you have a chance to see it.

/rant quit

Watched “Transformers: The Movie” over the weekend and I’ll have to say that I disagree with *all* the positive reviews this movie has received. What a load of crap. Throwing gobs of money, and special effects at a movie cannot make it good, or make up for the horrible writing/acting. And the out of control product-placement was annoying at best.

Yes, I loved Transformers as a kid–I had the toys, I watched the shows, I saw the cartoon movie, but this is just god-awful. It’s not that I’m a Transformers “fanboi” (;)), and I believe that Michael Bay has ruined my childhood memory–it’s not that at all. But judging this movie solely on its merits leaves much to be desired. Maybe I’m just an angry movie-critic, and have too high of standards, but, I like what I like, and I *didn’t* like this movie, period.

“…and though we are worlds apart, like us, there’s more to them than meets the eye.”-Optimus Prime on humans… In a few words, “forcefully-lame”

This one has been on my backlog for a while now, and I finally got around to seeing it. I gained a sense of perspective, if nothing else from this movie, and I would recommend it to anyone who hasn’t seen it yet.

I’ve got a great job, great friends and a roof over my head–that all counts for so much, but sometimes they can be forgotten or pushed aside in the pursuit of other things. As “cheesy” as it may sound (sorry for overusing the word “cheesy” in my more recent posts), this movie grounded me once more to focus on the things most important to me.

It was rather good,
I hope there is not a fourth,
Some parts were cheesy

Not very cheesy,
Better than Fantastic Four,
I recommend it

It’s cheesy.